How many quarts are in a gallon?

Four.

If you drop 10 pounds of bricks and 10 pounds of feathers from the same height, which will land first?

Your science teacher will tell you that they’ll land at the same time because they weigh the same, but they’re forgetting that the feathers will float in the air. Now if the feathers are packed tight into a burlap bag or something, they should land at the same time as the bricks.

Is Michael Kun lactose intolerant?

Maybe.

Doesn’t he know if he’s lactose intolerant?

Not really.

Is Michael Kun really as breathtakingly handsome as his pictures?

Yes, yes, a million times yes!

No, really?

Michael Kun is an old, out-of-shape man who looks exactly like his pictures.

So he looks sort of like Wilford Brimley?

Okay, now you’re just being mean. And why do we think you don’t even know who Wilford Brimley is?

Is it true that he’s a practicing lawyer?

Yes, that’s very true. He practices law in Los Angeles, California.

Did they really make a movie out of one of his novels?

Damn straight, they did. It’s called Eat Wheaties! and it stars Tony Hale (Arrested Development, Veep), Elisha Cuthbert (Happy Endings, 24), Paul Walter Hauser (I, Tonya), and Sarah Chalke (Scrubs).

Is the Eat Wheaties! movie any good?

It’s really good. Go watch it. The link to stream the movie is on the Home page.

Is The Allergic Boy Versus The Left-Handed Girl really his best book?

Yup.

Is it true that he had a clause in one of his contracts requiring his publisher to pay him a fortune if he ever became the heavyweight boxing champion of the world?

Very true. And that’s the main reason why he keeps his weight up. He gets nothing if he becomes the middleweight champ.